Mend Broken Heart

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The last “good bye” was said (or sobbed, screamed, etc.), now what?

I know exactly how you feel…I’ve been there and I pulled many young ladies out of there. I know what you want to do now, and ONLY if you want to get stuck in this terrible condition for a long time, can you cry, drink, eat comfort food, call up your “group of support from girlfriends, gay friends, and relatives” and listen to “I-told-you-he-is-a-jerk” opinions for days. Oh, romantic movies and music with antidepressants would complete the picture. And you can stop reading this post right here.

However, if you WOULD LIKE TO FEEL GREAT AS SOON AS POSSIBLE and move forward, you have to stick to the “I WILL BE THE HAPPIEST WOMAN IN THE WORLD” plan.

I always compare going through a break up with losing weight because it is easy to gain and absolutely hard to lose.

It’s easy to let yourself go and swim in love, and hard to accept the fact that it’s over. So, you should

1. Accept that “this is over”.

2. Realize that this is YOUR LIFE and YOUR LIFE is about YOUR HAPPINESS, and YOU ARE in charge of making yourself happy.

3. Stop going inside your head from picturing thousands of ways to murder your ex to imagining your three beautiful kids graduating from the college if you (didn’t do, didn’t say, didn’t want, or he didn’t do, didn’t say, didn’t ….)

4. Understand that like attracts like so if you are sad, angry, or jealous you’ll get more of the same, so you need to stick to something that makes you feel good.

5. Stop “spreading the dirt on the glass” – chewing the broken heart gum and talking to friends. You’ll have an aftertaste after those conversations anyways.

6. Know that it will take time to get over, and this is the perfect time for doing something good. Remember, behind every successful woman stays someone who has pissed her off.

7. Be familiar with the concept that it’s not a good idea to date someone else at this “recovery time”. You won’t meet the love of your life – just attract another sad individual who’d match your own feelings.

8. Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Yes, you lost your boyfriend/husband but some people lose their own lives, and people they love.

9. Figure out what you hated in your ex and what you hate in men in general. Write it down. Now based on what you’ve written write what you want. Isn’t this person is much better then your ex? Just wait, if you really want a person like this, you’ll attract him eventually.

10. Resize your ego. 99 percent of the break up is not about losing him but is about getting hurt. The bigger your ego, the longer the recovery.

No man is worth your tears, and when you find the man who is, he’ll never make you cry. (Anonymous )

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed. (Albert Einstein)

The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else. (Anonymous )

If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it dosent, then it was never meant to be. (Anonymous )

Pleasure of love lasts but a moment, Pain of love lasts a lifetime. (Better Davis)

Don’t let someone become your everything, because when they’re gone you have nothing! (Kenya Mitchell)

I dont know why they call it heartbreak. It feels like every part of my body is broken too. (Chloe Woodward)

Love is like a war:Easy to begin Hard to end! (ancient proverbs)

BETTER TO HAVE LOVED AND LOST THEN TO HAVE NEVER LOVED AT ALL (Hemmingway)

Love is blind — marriage is the eye-opener. (Pauline Thomason)

If a relationship is to evolve, it must go through a series of endings. (Lisa Moiyama)

1)

2) When you don’t care if your legs are shaved, nails are done and roots are colored before your date.

3) When you envy your single girlfriend (friend) when she/ he is getting ready for the “girls/ boys night out”

4) When while telling your best friend about yesterday’s “romantic dinner” you spent 98% of the time describing the menu.

5) When sex can be easily substituted with gym workout (and especially with a cute instructor)

6) When 8 times out of 10 you let the voice mail to pick up

7) When you sit with him/her, imagine that him/her, you and your mutual baby sits with you and you feel claustrophobic and depressed.

When his snoring doesn’t’ sound “cute” anymore.

9) When you prefer an earthquake over meeting his/her family

10) When his/her touches, kisses and hugs prevent you from enjoying the movie

Then this is the right time for Ending Relationships

Have you ever thought about what EXACTLY “Mending a Broken Heart” means?

It’s very simpe. Think about what healing a broken leg means. Does it mean you can run again, wear beautiful hills, and have pedi with flowers? You don’t have to take painkilles, use a walker, and feel bad. You are almost there. This would be a RESULT of healing your broken leg. What would the processe? Well, to visit the doctor, place a cast, go through a healing rotine, and then start walking…slow, then faster, and only then run, dance in hills, and and wear the most seductive toe designs.

The same principles apply to mending a broken heart. Do you want to feel happy, enjoy every minute of your life, forget about a painful experience, meet your true love, and live happily ever after? Those are RESULTS. But in order to get your results, you have to go through the PROCESS of Mending a Broken Heart.

What needs to be done in order to Mend a Broken Heart?

1) You have to realize that you REALLY want to mend your broken heart. Do not smile sarcastically – I know people who just enjoy swimming in their misery because they get tons of attention this way. Their frends and family suddenly call them more often, bring them gifts, take them out, etc. As a result, a  heart-broken person suddenly gets showered with attention and even though she says that she “wants to get over it”, subconciosly she does everything to stay where she is.

2) You have to accept the fact that healing your broken heart is a process. It won’t happen overnight and will require your own work. You can have all the guidance in the world, but you have to do your work yourself. It’s like losing weight. You have to hire a personal trainer and a nutritionist, but YOU are the one who has to go on a diet and exercise.

3) You have to stop listening to “experts” who suggests that giving yourself a little time to cry, miss your ex, and eat comfort food for a while is ok. They use this trick to keep your attention because it will make you feel not guilty as well as give you an extra excuse to keep waisting your time.

4) You have to stop discussing your break up with friends and family because it brings you back to negative mood.

5) You have to stop doing everything that makes you think about your former love; watch love movies, listen to romantic music etc. You should figure out what brings you positive emotions and stick to this. If it’s comedy movies – watch them every day.

6) And the most important thing you have to understand is like attracts like – in order for you to get positive events in your life you have to find positive things in EVERYTHING that is going on in your life as well as in EVERYBODY who surrounds you. You have to accept the world the way it is and stop willing to change it.

I went through series of break ups till I figured out the formula that really works but the most significant case of broken heart took about 3 years to heal. Now two weeks is enough to move forward and accept the situation as a great experience. Remember, the more positive you will be, the better surprises life will bring to you. And guess what? The person who broke your heart is not your true love, he is just “training equipment” that you used in order to meet YOUR REAL TRUE LOVE.

Reasons why a Break Up is a good thing:

1)    Do you like traveling? Who doesn’t? You can see your break up as an opportunity to travel in your life – you’ll see new people, new opportunities, and new places. If your relationships are broken – look at them as a dirty, neglected house you would like to renovate.
2)    Even if you are the most gorgeous woman at the world – there is always field for improvement. Nothing is more attractive than a woman who loves herself. The break up period is the best time to fall in love with yourself and enjoy your freedom.
3)    A Break up is not an end – it’s a new beginning. But it’s a beginning of something better. Look at the break up like pulling wisdom teeth – you will be scared to do it, then you’ll feel terrible after the procedure, but eventually you’ll feel great and look better.
Now, let’s get back on “How To Break Up”

If the break up is HIS idea

1)    Break up like a Lady – do not raise your voice, cry, pull out your gun, or throw your favorite china at him – he doesn’t deserve it.

2)    Just look at him, give the best Hollywood smile you can imagine and say “Thank you, it’s a great idea, I was thinking the same”.

3)   Then  Leave with the happiest look at your face.

4)    I do not suggest to cry, drink, eat all your ice cream and chocolate, send press release to all friends, family members, etc. You can do some of that but very quickly – you will have better things to do shortly.

5)    Commit to not answering his calls, emails, etc. for one month (if you commit for more – you’ll fail, I’ll explain to you later why it’s important)

If the break up is YOUR idea:

1)    Do not break up with him via text message or email – if you had any sort of relationship, then he deserves at least a phone call.

2)    Do not go into long explanations and give multiple reasons – just say “unfortunately, at this stage of my life I cannot be your girlfriend.”

3)    Do not feel guilty – you have only one life and can spend it the way you want.

4)    Do not tell him “let’s be friends” because he will “agree” with a hidden thought that you’ll come back.

5)    Do not agree on “good bye sex.”